Enneagram Type 8 - The Challenger

※ Download: Dating enneagram type 4

The thing is that personality does not change easily. But he is way more dramatic and affectionate than I am on a regular basis. Claim own authority and boundaries.

Self-control, conscientiousness, high ethical standards, their striving for improvement, practicality, industry, attention to detail and ordinary life tasks. Behaviors can be altered, personality can manifest in different ways, thought processes can be corrected and re-routed.

The Dramatic Four - Your comments would definitely lead me to have you explore the Type 4 in more depth. I took two separate tests for it, and both came back a 2.

People of this personality type are essentially unwilling to be controlled, either by others or by their circumstances; they fully intend to be masters of their fate. Eights are strong willed, decisive, practical, tough minded and energetic. They also tend to be domineering; their unwillingness to be controlled by others frequently manifests in the need to control others instead. When healthy, this tendency is kept under check, but the tendency is always there, nevertheless, and can assume a central role in the Eight's interpersonal relationships. Eights generally have powerful instincts and strong physical appetites which they indulge without feelings of shame or guilt. They want a lot out of life and feel fully prepared to go out and get it. They need to be financially independent and often have a hard time working for anyone. This sometimes necessitates that the Eight opt out of the system entirely, assuming something of an outlaw mentality. Most Eights however, find a way to be financially independent while making their peace with society, but they always retain an uneasy association with any hierarchical relationship that sees the Eight in any position other than the top position. Eights have a hard time lowering their defenses in intimate relationships. Intimacy involves emotional vulnerability and such vulnerability is one of the Eight's deepest fears. Betrayal of any sort is absolutely intolerable and can provoke a powerful response on the part of the violated Eight. Intimate relationships are frequently the arena in which an Eight's control issues are most obviously played out and questions of trust assume a pivotal position. Eights often have a sentimental side that they don't even show to their intimates, such is their fear of vulnerability. But, while trust does not come easily to an Eight, when an Eight does take someone into the inner sanctum, they find a steadfast ally and stalwart friend. The Eight's powerful protective instincts are called into play when it comes to the defense of family and friends, and Eights are frequently generous to a fault in providing for those under their care. Eights are prone to anger. When severely provoked, or when the personality is unbalanced, bouts of anger can turn into rages. Unhealthy Eights are frankly agressive and when pushed, can resort to violence. They can be crude, brutal and dangerous. Female Eights are far more likely to mistype than male Eights, as many of the traits typical to the type Eight personality have been discouraged in females. For the most part, however, it is other types who mistake themselves for Eights. This is especially common in male counterphobic who fail to recognize that their agression is a cover for a very deep seated anxiety.

Enneagram types 9 & 4: "spinning out" and relationship difficulties
Giving and caring quality, positive image, enthusiasm, desire to bring happiness, active forward moving energy, and flexibility. Depth of feeling, idealism, commitment to authenticity, depth of understanding, curiosity, and creative disposition. Practice directness in expressing own needs and desires. But the poor hound was so attached to its bone that it refused to let go of it and soon starved to death. I am always thinking now how can I ever be in love again? Spiritual Path Your spiritual journey is to connect to original source and create true meaning. They readily express their opinions and ideas and not wanting to be controlled generally want to be their own authority. Michael Goldberg's business book, Nine Ways of Working is good on these. I have lots of lust and a strong intimacy drive, but after the passion 'fades' - which only takes a couple months - I am prone to go back to my old ways - I like doing most things alone, I don't like anyone asking me what time I'm coming home, I'm hopelessly independent, I need lots of time alone with my creative projects, I need my daily long walks with headphones, I prefer going to social events by myself, I need full control of my eating habits and times, etc. Accept conflict, discomfort and unevenness as inherent in life. He was flirtatious, vain, and constantly concerned with what others thought of him, although detached from me.